What Have I Done?

I've never told you that I've never been happy.
I've never told you I didn't love you.
I've never accused you of being something
You aren't. 
I've never tried to make you feel guilty to get
My way. 
I've never left you, all alone, tired
Of living. 
Others have done this,
But 
I feel as if I am not as important or appreciated.
Never though, never, will I hesitate to tell you
I love you. ♥

Strangers

As we walk around as strangers

With blank stares, yet full and busy thoughts,

We're destroying ourselves. 

Just small and shallow words,

After practicing all that we'd say. 

Passing through, not passing by.

Suffering through, saying goodbye. 

Dreaming of us, but living as one.

I want to be friends,

You want to be more.

I want to say something,

You want me to say more.

There is only so much that I can mean.  

There is only so much that you can keep. 

So we continue to be strangers,

Only and except in our sleep. ♥

Something Wrong

Sometimes, when something is wrong 

We stop and begin to hum a song

Of less importance than our problems. 

The humming and the drumming of it all

Is what truly is our downfall. 

We get lost in the notes and the pitch.

The goosebumps, the feeling.

We begin to fall in love with the dream

The dream that swallows us with the beat. 

When's something's wrong, 

We stop and begin to hum a song. 

To take away the feeling 

That's keeping us singing. 

Singing, singing. 

Helping us go crazy. 

When something is wrong,

We stop and begin to hum a song. 

We begin to hum a song.

Nothing.

Nothing at all.

The Third Wheel♥

 

The Third Wheel♥ 

I used to be the one,

Who, to everything was told.

You had nothing to hang on to.

Nothing to let go. 

Nothing was held,

Nor was kept. 

As time will progress,

I will know less, and less.

Continue to tell him,

Her, they and them.

Instead of me.... 

We'll see who comes back running

When him, her, they, and them

Have gone to worry about 

Them, they, her and him.

The only thing that is more unfair

is that when you come back

For whatever it is you want me for,

I will have open arms,

Like I have always had before.

Sometimes Reality is so much more Surreal.

Be a Dreamer, Awake or Asleep. Be a Dreamer. Even the imagined means something. Even the imagined MAKES you something.

Death. How do we value it? Life. How do we value it? How much do we take for granted every day? How do we know that next Wednesday, that we will still be alive? We do not. We do not know how much longer we will live. We do not value life as we should, nor do we value death as we should. We take almost everything we encounter everyday for granted. We do not realize what our essentials truly are. What do we really need? We worry our time with being the best at something, or even sometimes being the worst. Too worried about attention and how we look. Both physically and mentally how people take us in. Why rest on nonchalant thoughts? If I were to pass in my sleep, I would hope that night something more important was on my mind than what I am wearing the next day. Like, how much I love someone, or adore the natural world. Thoughts and ponders, wonders and enlightening realizations. Even if they were all in my mind and never shared, I would like to go with purpose. Even if my just purpose was to be a dreamer.


Inspiration by the passing of Patrick Odom, only a junior who attended my school. Mar. 21 2011.

SIA!!!!

I went to go to bed, I just wanted to rest. I slipped on a plastic wrapper in my floor, slid into my bed side table,  and stubbed my big toe. As THIS happened, I sneezed, coughed, hit my head, and bit both my lip and tongue all at once. I stayed awake all night. Screw it all.